Square Rutabaga
They said never be content. So I'm micro-contenting.



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Friday, August 29, 2003
 
So...Should I rant?

I used "So," in the previous post, as a social cue that I was going to tell a story, and throw you into the middle without a lot of background.  It's also a bit of an attention getter, like "If you think about it", "If you read x, you'll see that..", yet those have a much more 'I'm smarter than you because I can even predict how you're going to react' tone.

My point? I'm glad I'm not the only one who get's annoyed at language idiosyncrocies. I'm glad we have blogs to vent, Ya know? That's goodJust sproig the spyglefiester.

But the funnest of all are enunciated sighs.  My usual (rare) response: "That was a 'sigh'." (leaving out the "care to talk about it?" but letting them realize I ('m distracted) care.)

Final comment: Whever you use the word "should" realize it carries at least twice as many units of blame as there are units of truth in humor.  It doesn't matter if it's personal regret, listener's will contemplate blame upon reflection.  It's a downer, knock it off. Don't try to cover it up with "I don't have time", as that translates to "I didn't make time" which also means "that isn't important, or convenient." There's a balance out there somewhere. Perhaps these are just road signs on the path to courtesy and a whole slew of other virtues.


11:19:07 PM    , comment []
Cats and Ducts

So we're getting ready to paint the boy's room.

Step 4. Tape the woodwork.

Step 5. Remove electrical and air-duct covers.

Step 6. Remove cat from cold-air return.

We have one smart cat and one dumb cat. Guess which one climbed through a 4'' tall hole to wander through our cold air return? The dumb one. The one that doesn't like cat treats. The one that doesn't know his name.

So when we heard periodic thUMBsss (the sound of a muffled metal base drum), we figured it was a. The other person, b. The dishwasher, c. The ducts popping (they do that in the winter, grrr.)  d. Wait a minute, it's not Winter. My mind flashed back to Daniel Striped Tiger sniffing at the newly formed hole in the wall, then Daniel climbing under the overturned dresser while we nail the backing on--"TAM!! TURN OFF THE AIR-CONDITIONER!!!!" That cat was nowhere to be found. I followed the air returns, see a predictable path, nowhere to open up a trap door, and proceed to remove the air filter from the furnace and create a 3'' exit for the cat. Next I went upstairs, held Lydia "adopting Mommy cat" near hole to lure him into coming out. No dice. He peers his cute head out just enough for us to lose all sympathy. Final step: Head to the basement, employ handle end of screwdriver, and bang on the ducts until the "cat came back..."

+1 walk-able basement. 

This one's for you, Mad William Flint.


10:48:27 PM    , comment []


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